What I am working on? Where have I been?

I have been away for a while. What have I been doing? I wrote a book. Yipee. I hired a PR person. I’m working on a novelette that’s being released in May via Smashwords. What is in this novelette? Well there are four stories. One is based on Mary who had a garden.

Mary, Mary, quite contrary,

How does your garden grow?

With silver bells, and cockle shells,

And pretty maids all in a row.

I will answer the long standing question. How does the garden grow? And new questions like who are these pretty maids who line up in a row. What are cockle shells? Flowers shh it’s a secret.  Hope you guys enjoy and read lol

 

Going Dutch

I can’t speak for the rest of Canada but going dutch in Toronto means that the girl and the guy split the bill of a date in half yeah half. I’m a modern woman but if a guy asked me to go dutch on a first date that guy wouldn’t get a second date. I know that it’s confusing for men because some of you guys don’t know if it would be offensive to pay and there is no way to gauge that UNfortunately. It’s like me offering to make a guy dinner and not do it ,order pizza and expect him to pay for it. I am an cheap inexpensive date. If I go to a fancy restaurant, I am looking to see  if they have a burger on the menu because my whole  thing is they can’t mess up a burger can they. Regardless of why I do it, my meal doesn’t cost that much so pay for it not because you want something from me at the end of the night but because it’s the right thing to do. You invited me to have diner with you so you should pay.

I got attacked today

I was walking in a familiar enough area . It was raining . I was running late and stupid TTC , Toronto Transit Commission , had streetcar stops that were out of order. WTF.  I am  always aware of my surroundings and the people in them. I saw this super sketchy guy and I registered that he was there but I didn’t react like crossing the street. I was trying to find my phone and I dropped my metropass. The guy pounced and said that the card was his. He had dropped it and I yelled no it’s mine. He grabbed my arm and continued to yell at me. I yelled back that I had dropped it and it was mine. He said okay. There were three older men who rushed to my aid then the guy disappeared. Here is the point of this story:

1) Be aware of your surroundings and the people in that environment at all times.

2) Random bad shit happens  in the good parts of a city too.

3) Be confident, strong and have your  voice primed to scream bloody murder

 

 

 

The “Angel”

My day began yesterday at the gym and I thought it was going to end at the hairdresser. My dad hijacked my evening which was cool because I am all about daddy daughter time until  I decided to go shopping. A man approached me as I was walking to the store. I am so happy that my dad was off somewhere else. The conversation below is what happened.

“Hi,” he held out his hand.

“Hi,” I shook his hand.

“Can I get your number?” he held on to my hand. SIDE NOTE: This isn’t the first time a guy hasn’t let go of my hand after a handshake. It’s weird stop doing it.

I shook my head and I glanced at my hand.

“You know what attracted me to you?”

“No,” I walked away trying to take my hand with me but he wouldn’t let it go.

“Your legs.”

“Thanks. I am so flattered.” SIDE NOTE: I was lying. I was just being polite.

“I didn’t  say anything to flatter you. I just speak the truth.”

“Thank you anyway,” I opened the door and I indicated that he could go first.

“Oh a woman opening the door for a man,” he seemed surprised.

“I have to go.”

“You mean I can’t get your number,” he followed me into the store.

“No.”

“Why?”

“I’m not looking.”

“Well that’s when you find someone when you’re not looking.”

“I like how you’re following me into the store,” I said sarcastically.

We got into a brief conversation about where we were from.

“Can I get your number? I really want to talk to you,” he grabbed my hand again.

“I’m not looking. Thank you though.”

“Well you’re going to let an angel pass you by.”

“My loss I guess,” I picked up some bake ware.

“I’m an angel that would treat you right.”

He said this a few times and went into this speech about how he was a good guy but I tuned him out with my laughter. I think he thought I was laughing because I was flirting with him but I was laughing because his lines were so lame. It felt rehearsed and disingenuous. He went on his way then I went on my way. I saw him standing at the exit talking to some other woman so I pulled out my phone to call my dad and I saw him out of the corner of my eye following me no doubt to convenience me that he was an angel sent by the heavens to heal my broken heart. He backed off after I said loudly hey daddy.

I wish that single men would abandon the lines and just say hi. Hi normally works when you’re trying to start a conversation with a woman. Just say hi.

 

 

My Unruly Life

The sun slept while my mind chased dreams that were nearly within my grasp

The world had trotted along without any regard for my well-being

My life wasn’t bound by structure

Time gnawed at my insides

I knew only worry

Peace kept its distance

My organs slowly withered away

Reality bellowed in the distance

My skull was cracked open and reason oozed out

My soul had illuminated my path and hope was led back into my heart

I leapt and I fell

My sight had been obscured by a single possibility

I had placed my probable future on an altar and I slit its throat

Envy crept slowly towards me

My womb was hollow

My heart was empty

 

 

 

This is NOT Cream Cheese Icing

So I went to this fru fru grocery store to pick up some fru fru ingredients for baking some yummy stuff and I thought to myself that since this is a fru fru grocery store they’ll have fru fru yum yum in my tum tum baked goods. Side note: Fru fru is my made up word for high-end, pretentious things or foods. My eye caught a red velvet mini cake. I was like hey cream cheese and chocolate yum ; HOWEVER,  it was $5.99. Eek but it’s a fru fru grocery store so their in store desserts must be good. Before I got it, I asked if it was cream cheese icing because there are people in the world who make red velvet cake with whipped cream icing or vanilla icing. RED VELVET CAKE NEEDS CREAM CHEESE ICING. I think this should be a rule or something. I got it. I bought it then I bit into it and DRUM ROLL PLEASE… it wasn’t cream cheese icing. I was going to throw it away but then I thought I paid $6 for it so I have to eat. The icing wasn’t whipped cream or vanilla icing. It was the sweet cheap white icing. Dear Fru Fru grocery store, if you’re going to charge $6  for a 4 inch cake make sure that it’s pretty DAMN GOOD!

“Don’t Run Away From Love”

Sorry to say that this isn’t about falling in love. I was getting some food at Dundas Square, for those who aren’t familiar with Dundas Square it’s Toronto’s version of Times Square but smaller and with less lights, with a friend and a guy said hello and I said hello back. Side Note: I replied to his hello with my hello because hello is my  knee jerk response to someone saying hello. He then said I was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. Side Note: In my head, I was like yeah right. You’re full of shit. In reality, I smiled and said thank you then walked away. He then yelled don’t run away from love. BUDDY COME ON. We both know this isn’t love it is lust . It’s a turn off when someone uses the line you’re the most. I am the most what? You don’t know me so how do you know I am the most anything. This is why I am single. UGH. I have no more words UGH.

Music Inspired Writing

I was listening to The Vampire Dairies Season 7 songs as I worked and I wrote the following words on sticky notes. I have also listed the links to some of the songs I was listening  to below. I swear I will listen to some happy music and write about love 🙂 sometime soon

The Vampire Diaries 7×20 Music – Cloves – Everybody’s Son

The Vampire Diaries 7×21 Music – Gnash (feat. wrenn) Fragile

The Vampire Diaries 7×22 Music – Clairity – Don’t Panic

The Vampire Diaries 7×22 Music – Aquilo – Silhouette

The sun chased away the nighttime shadows that lurked behind the doors that opened when I closed my eyes. The pain of his betrayal had dulled with time yet when I slept the memories of his peppermint scent, his warm breath as it stroked my neck and his deep voice that forced my heart to sway swallowed my begrudging thoughts of him. He had chained my heart to his words so his heart was allowed to roam free and ensnare whomever he deemed worthy. The trickery of love broke me and all that remained were the remnants for the woman I used to be.

The Pity Look

Yes I’m single.

Yes my eggs are beginning to turn to power.

AND guess what? I’m cool with it.

I don’t own property.

I still enjoy the laughter of children so I’m not dead inside.

I don’t have cooties.

I’m smart and ambitious.

I am skilled at many things.

So no need to give me that pity look.

I’m alive.

I have an editor.

I will have an agent.

I will have a successful book.

I will no longer have to worry about money.

I will no longer have to scale back on groceries.

No need to feel bad for me because if I am to have a child and a husband the universe will give me one.